Archives: 2013 October

Archive for October, 2013

Good Setlist

There’s this Southern California-based band called The Growlers. The music is perfectly fine, but the setlists have to be the best out there:

GOOOOAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLL

Baseball’s post-season isn’t exactly going our way, so we’re drifting towards hockey, where things make sense. Take this insane goal scored by a rookie San Jose Shark the other night. It’s that old-fashioned kind of fun we look for when watching the sports: low stakes, style and grace, and dumbfounding agility.

Thanks, Doctor Simmons.

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS BIRD?

Thanks, Tessa Stuart.

Disco. Disco Duck.

And The Winner Is…Canine

Carlton Banksy

Yesterday we brought you what was probably a real Banksy. Today we bring you what’s probably a fake Banksy. Only you can decide which you prefer.

City Art

We stumbled upon the latest Banksy in New York last night: an inconspicuous truck with a highly conspicuous surprise in back.

JOKES.TXT

Some lads from On the Media have started a sideline called TLDR (Too Long, Didn’t Read, yo). So far, so good. Listen if you have the time.

If not, we’ll try and bring you highlights, like this recent story: A dude’s dad dies. Dude begins to sift through dad’s computer and finds a document titled “JOKES.txt.” Dude opens it up to find the punchlines to a few dozen jokes, but no setups. Dude turns to the internet for help and the internet runneth over with love in the form of laughter.

The punchlines:

Smart Pills > Rabbit Pellets
Face like Sr. Wences’ fist
Ghost/Goat
Wife, brother, monkey, crash, Monkey Driving
Jesus/Pinocchio
Wendy/Welcome to Jamaica
Sheep/I wish it was dark
That Sheep Lies!
Death or Bungee
I was talking to the duck!
More fun than watching a monkey try to fuck a coconut
More ducks on that side
It’s your wife’s handwriting
10-inch dick & hangs up
Bear: You don’t come here just to hunt, do you
George Bush/Snapping Turtle
Talking golf ball more amusing
Genie, 3 wishes, visit to vet
Read my lips: bring a posse!
Priest, Minister, Rabbi; last wish, fork, Fuck your boat!
Last time you didn’t have holes in your feet.
I’m going to have to numm those
Duck hunter license for each state – cop’s fingers up duck’s ass
Indian names, tepee, soaring eagle, running deer, 2 dogs fucking
polish joke, bar, tell it six times
nice tits, where do you want these blinds
a round of drinks, no thanks, blew chunks
lorena bobbitt dead in crash, some dick cut her off
goddam fish, love this fucking place
Brick the camel
Designated decoy

The full jokes.

Be Thankful For What You Got

Though you may not drive a great big Cadillac
Diamond in the back, sunroof top
Digging the scene with a gangsta lean
Gangsta whitewalls, TV antennas in the back
You may not have a car at all
But remember brothers and sisters
You can still stand tall
Just be thankful for what you got

Thanks, Mwende!

Yo Soy El Batman