kal penn

Posts Tagged ‘kal penn’

Kal Returns to Kumar, Escape from Guantanamo Bay

As promised, I put on my Sunday best and trotted down to 1600 Pennsylvania today in an attempt to secure Kal Penn’s (a.k.a. Kalpen Modi) recently vacated post as one of Obama’s Associate Directors in the White House’s Office of Public Engagement. I haven’t landed the job yet, but the White House crowd definitely appreciated the signage:

My gussied up recycled cardboard was surprisingly enjoyed by young and old alike. From the Secret Service Police, to the ever-enamored tourist crowd, to real-life White House staffers, those in the know stopped a spot to appreciate a little abnormal picketing. I wouldn’t go so far as to qualify it as that, but the Secret Service 5-0 definitely did. The second I approached the fencing I was politely informed by uniformed security that I would not be able to just loiter with the sign — I’d have to walk it.

Four hours later, I was tuckered out, but not in vain — I had made some tangible gains in my mission to replace Mr. Modi as Obama’s liaison to Asian community groups. A retiree from Rochester pledged his support in exchange for a posed photo, a foreign journalist considered my shenanigans relevant to his tribe, and several White House staffers requested my resume.

Considering that giving out a resume in this town carries about the same weight as a handshake, I will further opine here, on the Internet, as Science intended:


*She said it was okay.

I’d say it’s clear that I should have the job, but I also think “2 Become 1” is wicked profound. I’m glad that slews of passers-by were amused, if not perplexed (“Who’s Kal?” was the most frequent response), by the sign. I’m glad to be considered for a job Kal was probably better suited to. And I’m glad that the Washington crime syndicate didn’t actually harm our man Modi before he put Harold & Kumar 3 down to celluloid.